I have to clean house soon. I have to get on with Step 4. I have to literally clean house. My room is a wreck like my life.

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It’s actually very, very late. I can’t sleep. My sponsor gave me a packet to work. It’s more than I thought it would be. I haven’t started on it yet. At tonight’s meeting, I admitted that I didn’t want to start on Step 4. This old timer said it’s gotta be done.

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I still don’t have a sponsor, and I’m not sure where to start with Step 4. What I’m starting to see is that all the lies start to stack up like bricks, and life begins to feel heavy. Doing this moral inventory will be like removing bricks one by one from the bag I’ve been dragging behind me all these years.

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What is manipulation? I think it’s when you purposefully do or say things to illicit a reaction that you believe will benefit you without regard to its impact on others. In other words, I want what I want to fulfill my needs at all costs.

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